Patch My Heart with A Cement

A heart made of stone can also be broken.

The front porch of the apartment is made of stone. I admire how strong it was built for safety since I reside in the third floor of the building. Just today, I realize its another purpose- to help me see something other people wouldn't see.

The outermost covering has become brittle because of the rain and the sun. I started peeling it off because I think vandalism is fun at times. I was able to  break it to pieces. The cement has shattered into puzzle pieces. I had fun rearranging the pieces to bring back its original look. I do it everyday when I stay there to smoke.

One morning, I was fixing the puzzle while thinking how my heart has been broken into pieces. I ponder on how a heart could be broken and be healed into whole again. My heart has been broken for a lot of times for years. Even as a child, everyone get their hearts broken. Even a kid whose favorite candy has been taken from him/her, she would cry because of a broken heart. To break a heart is inevitable like death.

A heart can be so strong for all the bruises and challenges it has managed to surpass. But with the rain, turmoil, and all painful emotions, the heart will be brittle and easy to break.

I managed to fix the puzzle on the first layer of the cement of the front porch. It was easy because you just need to follow the lines etched on the top of it and the curves of the sides of each broken pieces. It is just like a puzzle.

Seeing this, I realized how overwhelming it is to bring it back to its original form just by rearranging the pieces and putting them where they should go. Like a broken heart or a broken life. You can fix it. One just have to rearrange the pieces and put things where they should be. A messed up heart is easy to fix. One already knows how it should look like so the pieces could be set in place easily. He/She just needs to follow the curves of the heart.

As overwhelmed as I am, I stared at puzzle I fixed for a long time. There were small pieces of cement left and I don't know where to put them. I think that I just have to blow them away. I also noticed the cracks and the unfilled spaces. Those were not mended like my broken heart or my messed up life.

My heart is easy to mend because I know it is just a part of my life that needs to be fixed. My life is messed up. I just needs some little rearrangements. My heart needs the most attention for it to be fixed. I can live by without it-living heartlessly and empty. But I want to live full, filled with love, and no grudges or broken spaces. I know I can't mend it alone yet anyone can help me heal it if I could or would let them help. Like the cement on the porch that I enjoyed vandalizing, the spaces in my heart will be left unhealed even with the help of others.

The porch can be renovated. Someone can patch it with another layer of cement to cover the broken part. I wonder if there is any cement that can be used to patch the unfilled broken spaces of it.

Can someone hope for a cement to be invented specialized for a broken heart?